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Onion Sports The Ecstasy Of Defeat

All right. Welcome back for another beautiful episode of looking through Eric’s books. All right. Let’s see what we got here. I’m looking at this right here, sorry. But then I’m also looking at this. The Ecstasy of Defeat. This book right here. If you like weed and everything. The Botany and Ecology of Cannabis. This book right here is a mastermind. If you want to grow and all that kind of stuff, it’d be great. It’s too much for me. It’s too scientific for me. I’m not really… I like to smoke weed. I’m cool. I tried growing it, I’m not very good. Like I said before, if you watch a different video, I am no way Doctor green thumb, not even a little bit.

The Ecstasy of Defeat. Sports reporting at its finest by the editors of The Onion, with a foreword by anabolic steroids. What? That doesn’t even make any sense. Wait a minute. Tiger Wood Announces Return to Sex, 175. I’m sorry. That is just, that’s coming up. That caught my eye. This is literally like all the stories. What page was it? 175. Tiger Wood Announces Return to Sex. All right, so Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida. This is 10 years ago. I’m sorry.

All right, let’s see what this guy is talking about. “To be honest, I’d do it for free.” Woods added. “I’m the luckiest guy in the world.” During his amount, Wood released an aggressive touring schedule that affirmed his commitment to sex. He’s slated to take part in a three-day love making session in March at the Clarion Hotel in Orlando and confirmed that he would join a foursome at the Doral Resort and Spa in Miami as a tune-up for the first major fuckfest in Augusta, Georgia. In addition, Woods said he would not renege on his annual stop in Dubai and said he looked forward to boning a prostitute on the roof of the… what is this?

The 34 year old sexual superstar said he is far from satisfied by his previous erotic achievements and that he expects a return to sex even stronger than before. However, Woods admitted he may not in top form or may not be in top form at first.

I have absolutely no idea if this is true. Wow. He’s he’s like, “Not being able to get out there and have sex has really been rough on me.” Woods said. “I missed it. I love fucking with all my heart.” Woods said that during his brief time away from sex, he couldn’t stop thinking about one day resuming his daily regimen of sexual intercourse with random women who look vaguely like his wife, only skankier.

Go get them, Tiger. Go get them. That was 10 years ago. Wow. Again, I don’t know if this is true, but wow. We’re going to look a little bit more. Then I saw this too. In this little more of an article, because I don’t think I’m going to be able to cover 400 pages. We’ll go over here. This is April 19th. So this was February 19th, so a few months later, April 9th. Tiger Woods Followed Everywhere at Masters by Sex Addiction Sponsor. This is pretty interesting. I had no idea.

Wonder what Ted DiBiase’s talking about? A million dollar dream. Had reportedly fallen on hard times, admitting Tuesday he did not know the exact status of his one million fortune. “Well, the economy has been really bad lately and Virgil has made some terrible investments over the years.” Said DiBiase, shaking his head and adding that he hadn’t slowly counted a stack of bills in the backseat of a limousine in more than a decade. “I also lost track to where my briefcase is and that has about $5000 plus a bunch of IOU’s in it.” Ted DiBiase went on to claim that everybody has a price and said he was currently accepting offers to kiss people’s feet for a hundred dollars.

That’s 11 years ago, but that is super sad. I grew up with this guy. I love Ted, The Million Dollar Man, Ted DiBiase. Now if you’re broke Ted man, that’s terrible. What’d you do with all your millions?

All right. But we’re again, we’re talking about Tiger Woods and his return to sex 10 years ago. I don’t even understand what this Onion thing is, but you got to love a crazy stupid story like that. Very interesting. It’s old, but hey, it got me laughing.