Posted on

Either you do or you don’t, Fuck trying, Either you do or you don’t

This quote speaks measures, in the past, we have all been confronted with this statement numerous times. Starting as early as conception we are faced with the decision, either we swim and fertilize the egg or we don’t. This statement follows us with every decision we make on a daily basis. I am going to be happy (either you do things to make your life happy or you don’t), I am going to be more successful ( either you do things to make yourself more successful — read books, take classes, change your friends, or you don’t), I am going to have a more loving relationship (either you are going to listen or not. Most relationships are dysfunctional because we forget to listen, remember the only reason the other person is in your life, is because you want them there so it only makes sense to listen to something you want in your life). We all have to look in the mirror and face this statement, not on a monthly basis or a daily basis but on a consistent basis almost with every decision we make. Either you do or you don’t.

In life, there are no excuses for not completing a task. School has taught us about deadlines and failures, but has that really helped? I have to question the whole idea of deadlines, yes on a vast array of things having a deadline is very important. The baby is being born, I am getting married, I have to have this done so I can spend time with my family, these and others like it are deadlines we need to adhere to. In today’s society we are taught that we have a deadline to learn, k-12 grade, if you don’t learn on their schedule you are considered a failure. Excuses are taught, we learn how to use them in school. Then we take this skill with us throughout life, I can imagine if you had a lot of excuses why you could not do your homework when you were little, you have a lot of excuses why you can’t pay your bills or get a better job now.

 People are creatures of habit, if you habitually have been making excuses since you were younger why you can’t do things then you have programmed your brain to think small and only achieve small. However, if you change the way you program your brain if instead of thinking small and always thinking of how something can’t be done you start thinking about how to get it done. This small change will have amazing effects on the expansion of your brain and thinking. With this new mind frame, you will be able to complete any task. You will be able to complete any task because you will have the confidence and understanding that any roadblocks are fun and inviting challenges to expand our brains and create innovative solutions. 

This also has to do a lot with one’s integrity, when you give your word on something then you have to keep it. Honor and integrity have been replaced with lies and deceit. Lying and deceiving others is a horrible thing but what is worse is when we lie and deceive ourselves. When I was younger I used to think I was the best and knew everything, it is great to have confidence, but vanity and arrogance are a recipe for disaster. If I was the greatest and knew everything then how could I learn anything? Well I am 36 now and the answer is it was impossible, I could not learn anything because I would not allow myself to learn anything. when you are the best there is no room for improvement.  I will never forget a conversation I had when I was 18;

Unk: Does it hurt yet

Me: Does what hurt?

Unk: Your head

Me: Why would my head hurt?

Unk: You keep running into the wall, instead of just going around it

If we are the smartest, the best, and know everything then we will waste a lifetime trying to go through the wall, however if we are honest with ourselves and paint an accurate picture of ourselves we will be able to easily recognize the wall and simply ask how we can go around it. Or even better yet we can avoid the walls altogether.

You can not try to do anything, try is not a real word.  Take a moment and think about what I just said. Try and do anything;  try and pick up a pen, try to be nice, try to love someone. Either you do or you don’t. I will never forget a lesson one of my teachers taught us. He asked a student why they had not done their assignment from the night before, the student came up with an excuse and my teacher placed a pencil on the ground and asked the student to try and pick it up, the student with a smirk bent over and picked it up. Then the teacher said see there is no trying to do something either you do it or you don’t. It has been about 20 years since that incident but it is still prevalent in my life today.

  Try to me is the same as saying I was too lazy. If you do not become what you dreamt of being, then it is your fault. Nobody else’s, I want to rule the world, some of us have bigger dreams than others, if I fail I can not blame anyone but myself, I can’t blame my upbringing, I can’t blame my education, I can’t blame anything but myself. I used taking over the world as an example because there is no road map on how to achieve that feat. However, if your aspirations are not as high as mine there is probably someone in the world who has been waiting to help you their entire life, you just have to find them and accept their help. 

Every day is going to be a challenge, that’s what makes life interesting if it was easy then it would be boring. 

If every morning we wake up and read this quote as a reminder we will be more accomplished, we will not have an excuse every time we fail because we know failing is a part of life, using my failures as a learning lesson to be more prepared the next go around.

 Either you do or you don’t right!!!!!!!