Either you do, or you don’t. The choice is yours, and yours only.
The origin of this life lesson was in middle school, in seventh, eighth grade. It was my history teacher, and it was either history or Spanish, I can’t remember now. One of those things, if I wasn’t trying to explain it, I’d know exactly where it was. However, it was my teacher, nonetheless. One of the students, she didn’t do her homework the night before. She came, and she had an excuse. Right? And he said, “I don’t want to hear your excuse.” He dropped the pen, or a pencil, on the ground. He said, “Try to pick it up.” Now, being a seventh, eighth grader, she was sarcastically picking it up, kind of, “What am I, stupid? Of course, I can pick it up.” He said, “Exactly. You did it. There is no try. Either you do something or you don’t.” So I challenge you to do the same thing.
Let me see. Here’s a pen. Try and pick it up. You can try as much as you want. Either you don’t pick it up, which means you didn’t try, or you do it, and you pick it up. There are no excuses. Either you do it or you don’t.
You Don’t. You have excuses. You always have a reason it can’t get done. You procrastinate. Loves a constant state of stress or chaos. Is a victim. “The world’s only raining on me.” Avoids responsibility. “I didn’t do it. It was not my fault.” Associates with like-minded procrastinators. Misery loves company.
Excuses. Always has a reason it can’t get done. I think we all know a person, who, no matter how simple the task, they can never get it done, or how challenging the task, they never can get it done. There’s always a reason why they couldn’t do it. It’s, “I didn’t feel good,” or “I was busy,” or “I forgot,” or, “It was really hard, and I just couldn’t do it.”
Whatever excuse you give, is what’s going to define you.
So if you make an excuse for everything, well, then let’s translate what that really means. “I can’t find time to be successful.” “I was sick, so I can’t be successful.” “It is hard, so I can’t be successful.” Because each one of those excuses, what people don’t realize is, when people tell an excuse, it doesn’t affect the other person. People tell me excuses, why they can’t get things done all the time, all the time. It’s never an actual excuse or an actual reason. It’s always an excuse. “I can’t do it, because of this,” or, “I didn’t feel good.” I like to remind everybody, Michael Jordan, we all know who Jordan is. You might not know who he is, but you know the clothing brand, Jordan.
One of the reasons he’s the greatest is, it was the NBA finals, and he’s sick. Now, there was another game they could have played, so it wasn’t the worst. It wasn’t the end. It wasn’t game seven, I think it was game six, but he was extremely sick. He didn’t feel well at all. He could have been like normal people, and he could have found an excuse, not to go out there and compete, but he wasn’t normal. He was an exceptional player. That’s why he was the greatest, because no matter what it was, he was not going to have an excuse why they lost. So he went out there, and he gave it every inch that he possibly could. And they won.
In life, you can make excuses as much as you want, but they’re just like assholes. Everybody has them, and they don’t affect anyone other than yourself. When you have excuses, you feel accomplished, in that the person that you’re telling the excuse to lets it slide.
You’re like, okay, so you have another excuse when something else happens. But what you’re not realizing is that little by little, the person you’re giving an excuse to is losing faith in you. Eventually, before you know it, that person’s not going to have any faith in you at all. Then, to you, it’s going to seem they just cut you off, with no warning or anything. But the fact is, they didn’t cut you off. You cut yourself off. Why? Because you could never get anything done. You always had an excuse why you couldn’t do something. If you always have an excuse, why you can’t do something, then someone’s going to find somebody else that can.
Procrastination. Loves a constant state of stress and chaos. I’ve heard a lot of people say they work better under pressure. I’m going to translate that for you guys, just in case you don’t quite understand what that means. What that means is that you work better under stress and chaos, because pressure is just stress and chaos. There’s nothing beneficial about stress. So either you do or you don’t. When you procrastinate until the last minute … I used to be the king procrastinator, come on.
I never really cared about school. I never really read any books until I was in Mexico. I mean, I read when I was trapped in the rooms, but I wasn’t at school. I don’t think I read any school books, until Mexico. However, I was one of those people who worked better under pressure. At least I thought I did. Because in all actuality, if you do it before it’s done, do it before you need to have it done. If you have a week to do it, and you do it the first day, then you won’t have any stress.
It’s like, work hard now or work hard later. Because you’re going to have to work hard regardless, but you can waste as much time, and then at the end, work hard. Or you can be proactive, work hard now, and then move on to another project.
If you procrastinate to do things, you’re never going to see the full potential of your capabilities because you’re always going to be behind. When you have a week to do something, and you do it on the last day, then that’s four or five days that you could have had it done, and been working on something else.
Victim. It’s only raining on “me”. No, it’s true. It’s true. But it’s also only raining on me, and it’s also only raining on the other person, and another person, because in their life, the rain is only raining on them. I could be standing next to somebody else, but guess what? In my world, the rain is only raining on me. The other person’s not my world. It’s only my world. If you want to control the rain in your world, you have to take the steps in order to control your world. You’ve heard of an umbrella, a raincoat, a poncho. There are different things that you can do to protect yourself from the rain.
So just in life, if you don’t want to be the victim, unless you choose to be the victim, and then, that’s something that you choose to be. You want people to feel sorry for you. But if being the victim is not what you want to be, then just like when it’s raining, prepare. Put on a raincoat, bring an umbrella, have a poncho handy. You can get a poncho for 99 cents. Actually, you could probably get five of them, for 99 cents, on Amazon.I say that because some of the tools you need in life can be very inexpensive and simple. It all depends on how you want to look at life.
Now we’ve discussed this in previous chapters. What are the two things that you can control? There’s only two. Attitude and action, right?
Here’s a quick story. When I was at Cascade, this should be another lesson, but it works perfectly here, not to be a victim. One of the counselors, he was explaining a story. He could see the morale was down in everybody, and he was trying to cheer everybody up. I don’t think anyone got it. I got it, and it changed my life after listening to it.
He was like, “All right, I got a story for everybody. Now there’s two people. Now there’s a worker and there’s an owner. “Now this worker, he’s in a happy-go-lucky mood. Can’t change his mood for anything. The owner’s mad. He’s in a horrible mood. He can’t stand the fact that the worker’s happy. “Here’s the owner. He owns the mansion. He has all the goodies in the world, and he’s miserable. Here’s this worker who’s singing the work, and he has nothing. So the worker is doing hard work around the farm. It’s a horse farm, or cow farm, whatever. “The owner, trying to break the spirit of the worker, brings him over to the barn, with a smirk. ‘I need you to clear this room out.’ It’s a pile of horseshit all the way to the ceiling. They had been collecting this for years. So it’s rank. It’s terrible. “The owner walks away and says, ‘I got it. There’s no way he can be happy after this, right?’ Well, the worker looks at the shit, nods his head, grabs the pitchfork, and starts shoveling away. You got a little tune to it, singing, you know what I mean? Shoveling to the beat, right? “But a hour goes by, the owner comes down and sees that the worker’s still not sad. He’s like, ‘All right, I’m going to check on him in a little bit later. It just hasn’t been enough time.’. “Now, it’s been hours later. The owner comes down, the worker’s still working, and he’s about halfway done, but he’s still singing, and being cheery. “The owner just discombobulated, doesn’t understand how, after all the shoveling of shit, how could this worker still be happy? So he goes in, and he asks the worker, ‘How are you so happy, with all this shit?’. “You know what the worker says? He said, ‘I figured, with all this horseshit, there has to be a horse in here somewhere.'”
You can only control two things, your attitude and your action. The worker had two choices. He could have been the victim and looked at it as, “Oh, look at all this shit. What a miserable job I have to do.”
Or he could choose the one that he did. And he chose not to be a victim. He chose to look at the bright side of things, and wasn’t broken. The entire time, he’s whistling away, shoveling shit.
Now if this worker can shovel all day long, and keep a good attitude, just imagine how much shit you can shovel out of your life, and still keep a positive attitude. The world’s raining only on everybody. You’re not the only one.
So there’s absolutely no point in spending time worrying about how much other people have, and you don’t have. The only thing you should focus on is your attitude and your action. Change your attitude, and that will change your actions.
Avoid responsibility. These are the people that, either you do or you don’t. “I didn’t do it. It wasn’t my fault.” When I was in Mexico, if you read the book, you can see how this one, avoiding responsibility is completely foreign to me, because it was drilled into our heads that no matter what happens, there’s always responsibility, your own responsibility in whatever situation that happens.
So, “I didn’t do it,” and, “It’s not my fault,” those don’t register with me. I don’t understand it, but I hear it all the time. Like, “I didn’t do it. It wasn’t my fault.” Well, you’re the only person that was around, so whose fault was it? Just own up to it.
Have you ever seen a little kid? Literally, it’s easiest when I say this for a little kid, because people can register when they see a little kid do this, but what’s funny is, they don’t realize that that same little kid that did that when he was two or three or four, is still doing that at age 30 – 35. They haven’t changed, right?
If you were that kid that came up with these stupid excuses, and always say, “It wasn’t me,” even though you’re the only person that was around, but somehow, you just don’t want to take responsibility, and so, it wasn’t yours. Those traits carry you through life. So whenever you think about not taking responsibility, think of the two-year-old that just spilled his milk. Someone comes in and says, “What happened?” He says, “It wasn’t my fault. I didn’t do it.” “Whose fault was it?” “I don’t know.”
So avoiding responsibility, keep that image in your head, every time you try not to accept responsibility. There’s nothing wrong with accepting responsibility.
My mom taught me this a long time ago. “Just be honest, accept the responsibility. Because once you accept the responsibility, what’s there to do?” If they’re going to punish you, they’re going to punish you whether you accept the responsibility or if you don’t accept the responsibility. Now, if you didn’t do it, all right. But be honest. If you are known to accept responsibility, then people trust you. They know if you’re wrong, you’ll own up to being wrong. Then, when you won’t back down, then they are going to side with you, because they know when you’re wrong, you will admit it. Or at least after, you’ll admit it.
There’s been numerous times where I’ve been in the wrong. I could have swore up and down I was right, but I was wrong. But when I’m wrong, the one thing I do is, I will go tell the person I was wrong. I apologize.
You must always find fault in everything, because if it’s not your fault, then whose is it? Your make-believe friend? Grow up. How old are you? Two, three, four, five? If you’re broke or if you’re unhappy, or if you’re overweight, it is 110% your fault.
Associates with like-minded procrastinators. Misery loves company. I think we’ve all heard that saying, “Misery loves company,” but some reason miserable people are still around miserable people, and then they wonder why they’re miserable.
If you like going to the gym, and you’re in the gym every day, and you play basketball, then your friends are probably going to like basketball. You tend to be around people that have the same likes and interests as you. Maybe you’re not around those people all the time, because, maybe it’s just a three time a week ordeal.
You go play basketball, because that’s what you love to do. But then, the rest of the time, you like playing video games, or you like procrastinating, being a victim, having excuses. So during that one hour, or three hours a week, you’re motivated because you’re around motivated people. But then, when you leave that situation, you’re around other like-minded people like yourself, lazy and miserable.
If that’s the case, then what should you do? Maybe hang around the people that you feel motivated around, and spend less time around the people that are slow and not doing something.
An inactive person is lazy, right? I might sit in my house all day long, but I guarantee, I’m not just sitting here. I am being active 24/7. Even when I’m sleeping, I’m active, I’m plotting and strategizing when I’m sleeping.
I don’t enjoy being around people who are miserable. I don’t enjoy being around people that don’t strive to beat the best. So I have to be alone, until I meet people that are like-minded like me, because what happens is, you can be as motivated as the Energizer Bunny in the beginning. But then, you get around people who haven’t accomplished anything in their life to be proud of. They project their failures and disappointments onto your dreams and aspirations. And before you know it, you’re no longer energized like the Energizer Bunny. You’re pretty much slow. You’re like one of those cheap batteries that you get at the grocery store that lasts for a couple of weeks, and then they’re dead.
So if you want to maintain energy and determination and motivation, then sometimes it’s best to be alone. If you can’t find other people that are just as motivated as you, be alone, because at least when you’re alone, you can motivate yourself.
But it is nearly impossible to motivate yourself, when you have other lazy people or miserable people around you, spewing their laziness, their procrastination, and their misery onto you. Does that make sense? If you’re an individual that’s a motivated person, be alone, or be with other motivated people.
Because the worst thing that can happen for you is to be around an unmotivated person, they’re going to drag you down. If you don’t believe me, go ahead, be around them. See what happens.
Either you do or you don’t. This is,
You Do.No excuses, only reasons. When failure happens, they look for a reason than adjust to improve and become more efficient. Multitask. Multiple projects. When procrastinating with one project, work on a different one. Looks at loss as an opportunity. One door closes, another one opens. Looks for responsibility. Too busy to hang out.
No excuses, only reasons. You might think a reason and an excuse are the same thing. Very different. An excuse is, “I was feeling sick.” A reason is, “I got in a car accident, and my arm is broken.” And you come back the next day, you’re bruised up, and your arm is in a cast. That’s a reason.
An excuse is, “My tummy hurts.” While I was in middle school, our basketball coach used to say this. “Are you hurt, or are you injured?”
Because if you’re hurt, “Eh, that’s just an excuse. Get out there, keep playing.” If you’re injured, then you go on the injured reserve list, you’re done.
When you put that metric in things, you’ll see how fast people are no longer injured. That they can play through this so-called “hurt”.
Same thing with excuses. If it’s life or death, I guarantee those same excuses won’t happen. If it’s life or death, that reason’s still going to be there.
What about when you fail?
I fail on a daily basis. “I failed this morning.” “I was supposed to be on the bike at two o’clock in the morning,” or, “I didn’t get on a bike until 2:30, maybe 3:00.” That’s a failure.
“Last night, I drank two beers this morning. I could feel it.” That’s a failure. I drank too much. Maybe that was the reason I didn’t wake up early enough to get on the bike. So doers look for a reason, then adjust to improve. Me not waking up early in the morning, I’m looking for a reason.
What did I do yesterday that made me less effective and efficient today? Then I’m going to adjust accordingly, to make myself more efficient. So there’s no point in giving an excuse, there’s always points to give reasons. And then you can brainstorm on how you can solve that reason.
Multitask. A doer is doing things. He’s always doing something. There’s never a time where he’s not doing something.
Even when he’s just sitting there, he’s doing something. Even when he looks like he’s not doing something, he’s still doing something. He has multiple projects.
Now everybody procrastinates. Everybody has a sense of laziness, but there’s ways to be lazy and procrastinate in a healthy, productive manner, right? This is how you do it. I’ve been practicing this for quite some time. This is how I get a lot of things done. I have two or three projects. And I’ll burn myself out on one project, and then I’ll move right to another one.
So I have to get these chapters done. Well, I don’t have to, I have no reason to get them done, but my goal is to have them done by the end of the day. This is the last chapter, I’m going to have it done.
There are times where I’ll push myself a little harder on one project, and stay hyper focused on this one project. But starting tomorrow, I have to edit these pages. I have to start another project. I have to brainstorm how to build the website. It’s not on there anymore, I already moved it, but I have about six or seven different projects I need to do.
How do I accomplish so much in such a little time ? When I don’t want to do one project, I’ll put it off for a little bit. I’ll procrastinate as much as possible on it, but then I will do everything else.
If all things start at the bottom, my goal is to finish these chapters. Well, I’ll work until I don’t no longer want to work on the chapters.
But even though that’s my goal, I’ll start procrastinating on it, midway through the week or something, but then I’ll start working on something else when I’m procrastinating on writing chapters.
Then once I’m bored with that project, if I’m still not ready to write chapters, then I’ll start another project, and start another one. So then, by the time I’m sick of doing everything else, I’ll be ready to write chapters again. Then I’ll work hours on writing, and then I get to pick and choose whichever one I’m less bored with doing.
Does that make sense? The ones that I’m less bored with doing. The things that I don’t want to do all the time, sometimes I just don’t do it.
I avoid it for a little bit, but I’m doing other things. And then, when I got myself up to being able to do it, I accomplished a whole bunch of other things, and now I do that, the project I was procrastinating on.
But while I’m working on other things, I’m brainstorming how to accomplish or knock out the bigger problem, if writing these chapters is a difficult issue, all right? So while I’m working on other projects, doing other things, to save time after I do the chapters, and to work on other projects, I’m steady brainstorming on what I’m going to say, and what I want to talk about. Does that make sense?
I’m still working on the project, even though I’m not working on it, and I’m working on something else but in the subconscious. That’s how you can manipulate your brain. You got to use your subconscious.
Looks at loss as an opportunity. One door closes, and another one opens.
Now when I was really young, I was watching, I think, it was Mighty Ducks II. Yeah, because they were playing the Russians, or something. And the Russian coach was all mad, or something, I could be off.
I haven’t seen the movie in years. I’m 37, and the movie came out when I was eight, or maybe seven, so 30 years ago. The Russian coach was mad because it was a tie. The Mighty Ducks coach was like, “It was a tie, it was a good game.”
He said, “No. I would have rather lost than to tie. You learn more from a loss than a tie.” If you don’t look at your losses and study them, you’re never going to get better.
If you avoid looking at why you lost, then you’re going to continuously lose that way. So every opportunity, just like with failure, when failure happens, you look for a reason it happened, and then you adjust accordingly.
When you lose, you look at why you lost, and then you adjust accordingly. However, with loss, you have to also remember, when you lose a girlfriend, lose a job, lose whatever it is … Now if you’re a victim, you’re not going to see the opportunity.
But if you’re not a victim, then you’re going to look at it as an opportunity to test your skills, an opportunity to sharpen your saw on different avenues of your life. If you break up with a girl, don’t be a victim. Look around. That might have been the perfect opportunity.
And you never know. The very next day, or next week or something, you might find somebody, and run into somebody at the mall, at the beach, or wherever it is, and that could be the perfect person. But if you’re so concerned about the loss, you’ll never look for the opportunity.
Looks for responsibility. So as a person that does not accomplish things, he tries to avoid all responsibility, a person that does things looks for responsibility. Let me explain something. The more responsibilities that you have, the more money you will make. However, don’t overload yourself with stupid responsibilities.
I didn’t say, be a yes man or a do boy, and then, just take on everybody else’s responsibilities. I’m saying, take on your responsibilities. The more responsible you are for yourself, the happier you will be.
It’s when you don’t take responsibility for the things that you need to take care of for yourself is when you have stress. It’s when you start not doing things, and it’s when you start avoiding responsibility.
Don’t overload yourself with stupid stress and stupid responsibilities. Make sure that your responsibilities are only responsibilities for progression, not degression. Now, if you do, you are too busy to do anything else.
You’re too busy to hang out.You might specify a small amount of your time for hanging out, just human interaction, and less time to be a machine all the time. When I’m considering being a machine, I’m not saying, “Be a robot.” I’m talking about, your mind’s always on business.
Sometimes, you might need some time, where you just need to relax, and let go of business, but don’t let that be a common thing. Don’t forget, the only way you’re going to accomplish something is to do it.
When you’re hanging out, it amazes me how much people tell me, they don’t have time, or they can’t get something done. But you know what? You know how many hours I waste in a single night going to my neighbor’s house or something?
It might take me, what, 40 minutes to make a lesson, and I dread it all day. But I’ll go up to my neighbor’s house, and before I blink my eyes, I’ve been there for two hours, wasted two hours.
Yeah. I was enjoying myself, kind of, but then when I come home, I’m like, “Well, damn, I wasted all this time I could have been doing something productive.”
That’s why you’re too busy to hang out. Because you understand hanging out wastes a lot of time that you could be doing something to project yourself to a higher standard of living.
To end everything, either you do or you don’t. No excuses, multitask. Always look for opportunities in loss. Always be responsible, and be too busy to hang out.
Table Of Contents
- Live In The Here And Now
- Walk With A Purpose
- All You Need Is 2 Dollars
- A Man Can’t Be A Man Without A Plan
- Does It Hurt Yet
- Be Careful When You Are Using Someone That Person Could Be Using You
- Use Em, Abuse Em & Lose Em: A Zero Sum Game
- Picking your own shit
- I hate people – people are stuupid
- I stay ready It keeps me from having to get ready
- Be Selfish
- Either You Do Or You Don’t